Not Spoiled Children

Hebrews 12:3-11

³Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. ⁴In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. ⁵And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. ⁶For the Lord disciplines the one he loves and chastises every son whom he receives.” ⁷It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? ⁸If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. ⁹Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? ¹⁰For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. ¹¹For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

When I was a kid (back in the dark ages when it was considered just fine to spank your child if they misbehaved) I admit, I did receive my fair share of spankings. My father would tell you today he wishes he had not done that, choosing a different kind of discipline instead. And ultimately, he did do that when I was pretty young. The truth is, spankings didn’t seem so bad to me. As a form of discipline, they were quick – so they actually were not much of deterrent for me. It didn’t take him long to figure that out either. But I was disciplined as a child. My parents love me, and an undisciplined child was a mess in the world and they wanted to raise a godly, responsible adult.

God is our Heavenly Father, and He does not withhold discipline either. The parent who allows their child to run wild in the world is doing a disservice to all. Our Father is wise and disciplines us when necessary, for the consequences of running wild in the faith are severe. Solomon wrote about this in Proverbs and those words are quoted here in Hebrews.

Proverbs 3:11-12

¹¹My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline or be weary of his reproof,

¹²for the Lord reproves him whom he loves,  as a father the son in whom he delights.

There have been times in my own life where I have been disciplined by God in the form of consequences for unwise choices. I’m often mystified by people who are shocked when bad things happen to them as a result of their own choices. They can’t figure out why God is “punishing them” by allowing those consequences to play out. I’m not sure that’s actual discipline, but those consequences can prove to be valuable teachers.

But sometimes, bad things happen to us and we were not the author of those events. God allows Satan to mess with us, but – and this is the mysterious part – for the purpose of deepening our spiritual maturity. When all is well and we’re smoothing along, I fear that we can become lazy in our spiritual life. One of the hallmarks if the human condition is that we seem to learn our best lessons in the crucible rather than in a gentle breeze. God knows this and uses that fact to draw us deeper. When it the midst of the mess, we’re can be miserable and whiny, but on the other side, if we take the time to look back, we can see growth. It’s a loving Father who fosters that growth.