Of Wives and Husbands

1 Peter 3:1-6
1Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2then they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. 7Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

As Peter winds his was through the topic of submission, he has discussed slaves & masters, citizens & government, and sinner & Lord Jesus. Now he lands on the marriage relationship and the forms of submission that take place between husbands and wives. In these verses, Peter’s words are mirrored by those which will be penned by Paul a decade (or so) later.

When Peter was writing these words to the Church, it was largely made up of adult converts. At that time, we can assume that there were many, many households where one half of the marriage came to know Jesus as Lord and Savior while the other partner remained pagan. That could have made things interesting indeed if you were inside of one of those marriages. Peter is in no way telling the women who now found themselves married to an unbelieving husband to walk away from their marriages. No, he is in fact telling them to stay and live in such a way as to win their husbands into the Kingdom.

Peter also addresses what appears to be a problem for women of all time periods; paying too much attention to your external appearance. We know with certainty that is an issue in 2018 and apparently nothing has changed in the last 2,000 years! Verse 3 is not telling women today that braids, jewelry, and nice clothes are sinful, but that women (and men) should prize the beauty of character more than the beauty of fashion magazines. Wouldn’t that be amazing?

As we ponder these words we must remember that in God’s eyes, men are not prized more highly than women. To believe that brings about a life of abuse and sin. But, we are created different from one another and those differences are to be embraced and cherished. Since every organization needs a leader (and families are indeed “organizations”) God has chosen the man to be in the lead. That doesn’t make him more important. It in fact makes his path more difficult, for his responsibilities are greater. Women have abilities and characteristics that need to be respected by the men who love them and it is a wise, wise man who leans on his wife for advice and counsel.

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