Well, That’s Interesting

1 Corinthians 7:8-16

⁸ To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. ⁹ But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. ¹⁰ To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband ¹¹ (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.

I will start today with a new detail I found to be surprising. Based on this passage (and a few others) many theologians (including Martin Luther) believe(d) that Paul was a widower. I had always been taught that he was a bachelor for his entire life. But apparently, this was most likely not the case. I throw in this passage from The Concordia Commentary only because I found it fascinating.

At the time of writing, the apostle was not married. Such undistracted devotion to the Lord’s service was his ideal for all Christian people. But this does not mean that Paul had never been married. He may have been a widower. Another possibility is that his wife had left him, perhaps as a result of his conversion. Either of those two situations would be in harmony with the Lord’s commands and Paul’s advice in 1 Corinthians 7. The question is this: to what degree of detail should Paul’s comparison in 7:8 be pressed? His counsel for widowers and widows to remain “as I” could imply that he too was a widower. Or the comparison could be simply on the basis that he now has no wife, without offering any details about his past circumstances. His wish in 7:7 for “all people to be like myself” is probably best understood as referring simply to his lack of a spouse at the present time.

Luther’s German translation of 1522 renders this verse: “Ich sage zwar den widwehern und witwynnen” (“I say, indeed, to the widowers and widows”). His 1523 commentary on 1 Corinthians 7 maintains: “From this text [7:8] it follows that St. Paul had had a wife, for he considers himself a widower.” The basis for Luther’s view was that “in Jewry everyone had to marry, and celibacy was not allowable unless by special permission and as an exception made by God.”⁵ Especially was this the case with men who were devoted to the study of the Law and were thus expected to set an example. According to Jeremias, “Paul was an ordained scribe. Acts 26:10, where he speaks of his functions as a judge, makes this quite certain.” This greatly increases the likelihood that he had been married.

Thus Paul grants that it is “good” if widowers and widows follow his lead and refrain from remarrying. The apostle insists, however, that an exception must be made to his advice that widowers and widows remain as he does. If they lack self-control and are tempted to visit prostitutes or indulge in extramarital affairs, then the remedy is that they must marry. “For,” Paul says, “it is better to marry than to burn” with sexual passion. Again he is almost certainly countering an ascetic group which sought to forbid the remarriage of widowers and widows. Paul, on the other hand, consistently maintained that the death of a spouse left the surviving partner free to remarry.

Lockwood, G. J. ©2000. 1 Corinthians (pp. 235–236). Saint Louis: CPH.

Onto the true topic of the passage. Paul addresses the concept of Christians divorcing from their spouse and for the most part, it is an unacceptable practice. In Jewish culture, the woman was never able to instigate a divorce and the man could do so for almost any reason. In Greco-Roman society, the woman had equal rights to initiate divorce and the church in Corinth most likely contained both Jews and Greeks. It seems that there were even some Corinthian women who were rejecting sexual relations with their husbands in some misguided form of heightened spirituality. Paul condemns this practice. In a couple where both the man and woman embraced Christianity, divorce was unacceptable. Divorcing one spouse to marry another was nothing other than a legalized form of adultery. Those words ring with judgment in the ears of our current culture where throwing away a marriage is fairly easy to do.

At my age and with the experiences I’ve had in my life, I know that this is an incredibly complicated situation for most people who face marital struggles. I cannot even begin to count the number of people (both men and women) who have sat in my office and wept over the dissolution of their marriage. It is heartbreaking, and I believe it is heartbreaking because God’s heart is broken also. But divorce has been a reality for thousands of years.

Marriage was designed by God back in Genesis with Adam and Eve. It is a beautiful representation of what God’s relationship with us looks like and as such, when marriage ends in divorce, that picture is destroyed. That is why God says, “I hate divorce.” But He does allow divorce “because of the hardness of your hearts.” So – what can we say about this hot topic? God doesn’t like it, but it is a reality. Those who have experienced it know real pain and we must be sensitive to that pain. To do otherwise sets us up as judge and jury over another’s life and we don’t get to have that position either. Paul’s admonitions come from the Lord but so also does forgiveness through the blood of His Son Jesus. God may hate divorce, but He loves us.